Friday 26th October 2012

Today I went to pick up my stuff from the dick heads place.... -happy dance- However... when i got there some random scruffy looking trampy female came out as i pulled up outside. She said in the most rude voice 'oh YOU must be the Ex'............................... I almost flew at her, for one SHE was not supposed to be there and two.... WHAT THE FUCK HAS IT GOT TO DO WITH YOU!?!?!?!!!!!! in the words of Lee Evan...'FUUUCCKKK OOFFFFF!!!!'

Anyway back to the situation in progress... i started at 10:30am finished by 12 noon.... HOW perfect is that?! \o/

BRING ONNNNN MONDAY!!!!!!!!!

G'Night Blogger!!!!!!  xxx

Thursday 25th October 2012

I flipped at my sister again. not proud nor am i sorry. shes a cunt... i disowned her now though, wrote her a note telling her i want nothing more to do with her. I can't handle her and neither can anyone else... So good rid dens to bad muck. 
I feel suicidal and all sorts but i need to not hurt myself again...ever. I'm not that girl anymore I'm going to be better than that. my new life starts on Monday and i CAN NOT wait!!!
I have a headache so I'm not going to type much.


G'night Blogger xxx

Wednesday 24th October 2012

Today has been kinda on and off, but who cares? BECAUSE I GET TO MOVE IN WITH SIR ON MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!! -does happy finger dance-

okay that is all..... hehehe


G'night Blogger! xxx

Monday 22nd & Tuesday 23rd October 2012

I was going to write to you yesterday blogger, but apparently life decided different, the drama came back, my sisters only just come home, however for beating her i have been exiled to my nana's until i move. YAY!!!!! -.- I love my nana but she just doesn't stop annoying me when im trying to do something, yesterday was a head ache and today is a bigger headache... i feel sick and infact i haven't eaten....still.... -.- Sir is gonna kill me >.<... Well... at least i think he is :/ He's gone AWOL and i'm actually very worried... He just all of a sudden stopped messaging me... so close to my move with him and now all my insecurities have came rushing back.... I am probably just over thinking but I guess it's a defense mechanism from all the past times i've been dropped...

I need and want Him.... I hope he doesn't go.... my life is nothing without him.

I'll update you on that Blogger
G'night xxx 

Sunday 21st October 2012

I finally flipped... I mean how dare my sister hit my mother. I flipped out on her, I am not sorry... Infact I didn't want to stop... I wasn't gonna. I am still fuming... How DARE anyone do this to me, just when i was starting to calm down! FUCKING SICK OF THIS!

fuck you blogger 

Saturday 20th October 2012

Well today was fine really, not much happened, well... I thought i'd lost my purse which well i found but that is literally about it. 
I have literally not had a shit day at all, Sir rang we chatted, he was going to a friend of his... or should i say ours now birthday do and god forbid he forgot his beer! Then i went home with the boxes I collected from some shops while i was out earlier for my move to Hinckley, which i might add i can not wait for! then I watched the movie 'Thirteen' with my little sister which i think i might review, the only reason i watched a 18 with a 12 year old is because it's a tame 18 and i needed her to realize why i am so protective of her... I hope it worked.
So i best run and start blogging Thirteen or Sir will beat me to it ;P

Bye for now Blogger xxx

Friday 19th October 2012

So today was interesting.. started off okay, no messages or missed calls from the ex because I changed my number! HOOORAYY!!! Not only that but my sister is starting to do things herself instead of expecting it done for her, which I'm well chuffed about! 
Then the afternoon came... my partner actually grew a brain cell. He decided to call my mother, and of course my mother ignored him, good on her! Bastard needs to stop being up my arse and start fucking off!
 I felt sick going out to the shop to buy food with mother because, well he lives literally 10 minutes up the road from my mother and if i ran in to him id have spat in his ugly fat face, and then proceed to kick him in the balls and make him kneel at my feet like the worthless cunt he is! By his pure luck he wasn't no where to be seen, so I relaxed. I went to my nana's after that that she was in a shitty mood, oh well makes a change from usual... NOT! 
Came home just put the shopping away then guess who started banging at the door? YEP you guessed it... HIM! I ignored his constant banging at the door for a few moments but then said to myself 'yknow what?... fuck it i will go and stand up to him NOTHING can make me feel bad especially not that cunt rag!' So i answered the door, there he was stood there all tramp like with his stupid bob curly hair... does not suit him it makes him look like he belongs on the streets... 'WHAT?!' i said in a hard tone 'you text me saying my money was at your mam's' 'uhhhh no i didn't...' 'yes you did'.... 'no i did not... i dont have your number! and do not want you to have mine so HOW could i have text you? it was probably my mother telling you it is at nana's... ' 'uhh okay' -stands quietly and awkwardly- 'i paid all the rent' 'oh okay '-snorts-  'why are you laughing?' 'i am allowed other emotions besides miserable!' 'i didn't say you were but you snickered after i said i paid the rent' ..... at this point i was fucking pissed off at him, yet again, for trying to run my emotions to the ground. this went on for a while then i told him i was going to get my stuff next friday... he told me i was not taking anyone to help me because it was his house... I PAY THE FUCKING BILLS STILL!!!!! So we argued about that.. for ages... then i said look just let me get MY stuff from the house on friday i will take my mother and the woman helping me can sit outside... what he doesn't know is i will be taking her in, and i will be packing EVERYTHING i own. 
I then told him bye and pushed the door in his face because i was beyond the point of giving a shit... I found out he had the cheek to bring his new slut (my mothers old best friend and someone i have known since i was a baby) with him... funny isn't it how he can afford to run a car, tax it, and pay the rent.... and he still badgered me for money! well he can fuck himself. or his new rotten cunt whore.
  

After that my 12 year old sisters new 38 year old and 70 year old pedophile friends were told never to allow my sister in the shop again. YAY!!!!!!!   

I found out that they had been telling my sister and her friend that they were gorgeous and if they were to have kids it would be them they would choose, all this whilst they were hugging and giving my sister and her friend things! I hope their dicks burn off!
Why can't all men be decent and stop thinking with their cocks or stop thinking about themselves? it does my fucking head in!

Now I am laying on the floor typing this on my laptop wondering what to do without my Sir... He means the world to me. I hope I see him soon I miss him :(

G'night Blogger :3 xxx    

Thursday 18th October 2012

Today has been one of those days you just wanna grab and stab. In fact its been one of those few months, but today was the worst of all. 

It all started to deteriorate just over a week a go, when my mentally abusive ex decided to start bullying me for money. (If it wasn't for a couple of people supporting me I would still be in this predicament... I am so thankful...) I told him i owe him nothing which I don't think i do... because I pay all of the bills in that fucking house! EVEN THOUGH I AINT LIVING THERE!!! Anyways... he bugged me none stop while i was away with my new partner, for a whole week.. then the past few days it got worse, ringing and texting every 30 seconds to 30 minutes... I did turn off my phone a lot of the time but why the fuck should i turn MY phone off? It's like he still think he owns me... well fuck him because he aint getting me back EVER!

Then today it got at the peek of all i could handle... to the point i changed my number and had to threaten the bastard with the police....THREE TIMES!... Now I can't handle a lot of things, but this, this was one of those things i wanted to open the door and kill him for, I had nothing when we got together and i again have nothing now... So what the fuck more does he want? urine? blood? cum????!?!?! I can't give him any of those, because for 1 i hate him and for 2 he isn't worth my body. He ruined my life.. i gave up everything for him, school, work, my mental health... It's never ending with that selfish prick... 

Not only has that been happening but my little sister, has become very nasty, and we have recently discovered someone who she met 2 weeks a go is buying her things and giving her hugs, this person is a fat man who owns a business at the bottom of the high street that isn't even good, the price list is cheap enough for any child to go in and spend their money on.. what if he's done it before? what if he's grooming my sister to hate me and my mother? She doesn't see this though, because she is only 12 and everything 12 year old kids do are rebellious and ignorant to the reality. I only worry because when i was around her age a similar thing happened to me... what if it happens or is happening to her? I dread to think :/

I guess I will wrap this up... but this isn't half of it, i can't handle it, but i know i have to because of my lover and my family and friends... if i give up now, i'd have wasted my life more than i already think i have done.

Sev x

My wants and needs from this Blog

So this is going to be my new blog... I've never blogged nor have I ever wanted to, until i found the love of my life... He blogs reviews about literally anything he can get his paw on.

He suggested I should start a blog, mainly about my feelings, maybe just blog about how i have been or what is on my mind, so, here i am... I claim the right to say what i want on MY blog without being scrutinized, I am using this as an outlet for things and if you read it and want to hurl abuse at me for voicing how i feel then you are not worth my time :D